We had beer in the boardroom at lunch today, so I find myself late this Friday afternoon drunk at work. Being drunk at work as an adult is a little like being drunk at home when you are a teenager: an alien feeling in a familiar place. (Though, it should be noted that I work in publishing, the original industry of now-frowned upon three-martini lunch; publicists like myself do what we can to keep this tradition alive. It was my boss who showed up with two Heineken pony kegs and told us to get busy boozing. It wasn't the first time and it won't be the last.)
I may be a little lispy and heavy in the eyelids now, but I didn't need liquid courage this morning to do what I've been putting of now for months: I picked up the phone and scheduled my surgery. I'll say that again. I lifted the receiver off the cradle, dialed numbers, and requested that my boobs be removed from my body. Tentatively, this will happen on December 18. Which is five months from tomorrow. Holy shit.
I'm keeping this brief because my typing skills are a bit compromised, but I wanted to put this out there now (because everyone knows that once something is on the internets, it is real). The countdown begins. My natural ta-tas are on their farewell tour. And so is my anxiety. Because five months and two days from now, I won't have to worry 24/7 about breast cancer anymore.
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ReplyDeleteI had bilaterals in March. My mom, grandma, and great grandma all died of br. ca. Something else will have to get me. My surgery went well. It took about a week for me to feel normal after the mast. I needed pain meds and sleep aids at night for about a week. Was tired during the day due to the anesthesia. This went on for about 5 days. No biggie. The expanders were not painful. Take some ibuprofen before and after. You may need a dose at night before going to bed. I had the final implants put in a month ago and they look fantastic. Recovery from that was swift and I felt good within three days. I was biking 8 days later and am running and back to my normal activity. My doctor let me get back to my workout routine "whenever you feel up to it" which is different from most docs who impose a 6 week rest. This is very doable. I am so glad to have this "off my chest." Good luck to you.
First of all, thank you a 1000 times over for your question suggestions at my blog -- invaluable! I really do appreciate it, you made alot of good points I need to bring up.
ReplyDeleteMore importantly -- as to your own surgery date...wow...just, wow. So many ways for you to feel, I'm sure. I know my ride has been a roller coaster and yours, while different, is no less a doozy (sp?). In fact I would imagine in some ways it could be even more dramatic. I'm being forced into this timing-wise, and while you are no doubt doing the right thing, getting the courage to take these new steps forward is daunting. You are amazing, very strong -- even if you don't feel like it sometimes, you really are, that's quite clear to anyone who reads this blog (or knows you, I'm sure).
You have plenty of time on your hands to let your thoughts run wild and your emotions hit every spot on the map, of course. But on the other hand, you also have time to come to even more realistic terms with some of this, to get ready, prepared. Though I'm not sure anyone can really ready themselves completely for this...do you think? Or maybe that's just me, lol.
What a bit of rough road we have ahead of us. Yet I just know in my heart that yours will get easier within days of having that surgery. Hang on to that...mentally fast-forward whenever you can. It will be a good place, on that other side of surgery :)
Congratulations? Not sure if that's the right word... but it is a big step and it's definitely a step in the right direction toward not getting breast cancer, so I think congratulations works. I hope you have a good experience and that you're feeling a little more peace of mind!
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